Start by saying, ”Thank You!”

Updated: Sep 11, 2020

“My husband never helps me!” Yelling and frustration often accompany this statement...

Women often have to wear more than one hat throughout the day: a wife, a mother, the taxi driver, a nurse, and the teacher who must have an answer for everything, etc... Have you already seen the cartoon-style picture of a woman with 50 arms and disheveled hair? That is exactly what being this kind of woman looks like...

When our days pass quickly by with us feeling overwhelmed, running from one thing to the next, it is easy and unhealthy to make a negative assessment about the actual contribution of our spouse...

We had our five sons in six and a half years. They were all so small at the same time. Our days were never ending. Eric left very early and often came back late because he was running a very busy full-time job, as well as planting a church... Consequently, he was rarely available to help me with the housework. In that season of my life, it was very tempting to meditate on this love killing sentence, “My husband never helps me!”

I am going to help you save time by avoiding all the discussions that we went through. We eventually realized that Eric had the vital need to be seen, celebrated and thanked every time he took part in the menial tasks of our large family life.

I can hear some of you saying: “I just need things to get done... after all, it concerns the both of us!” Yes, this is true! These tasks concern the both of you, but if your man is like mine, start thanking him by telling him that you notice when he gets his hands dirty... you will be surprised how spontaneously, and with a smile on his face, his participation exponentially increases! The more you thank him, the more he will enjoy doing his part...

This is a principle that applies outside the context of household chores as well: saying thank you and celebrating what each one does to cultivate the “us” is a real key to blessing your spouse and blessing your marriage...

So, instead of complaining, start by saying “thank you!”

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