Remain a Lover, Even After Children



The arrival of children can upset a couple’s life on more than one level. Sleep, of course, will be disrupted, and sometimes  this lasts for several years. The budget and family logistics will also be affected. The couple will often have to rethink their sexual intimacy.

A woman, when she becomes a mother, very often has her need for connection and satisfaction filled by the arrival of this little person who depends wholly on her. When she breastfeeds, her body releases oxytocin, the bonding hormone, so she no longer seeks this hormonal release from her husband during their sexual intimacy.

Ladies, you will be a better mother if you choose to first remain a wife and a lover! According to the order of priorities that God has established for our lives, taking care of yourself, and your spouse comes before the children.


Of course, there is no thought here of abandoning your children. However, just as we are told to do on an airplane, you must put our oxygen mask on before putting it on your child. You must prioritize your marriage in order to be an effective parent. 

When a wife is her husband’s lover, she will feel physically fulfilled, emotionally connected and spiritually protected because sexual intimacy is maintained with her husband.

Often there are medical recommendations given after childbirth, and, of course, we encourage you to respect these but resume your sex life as soon as possible for the wellbeing of your marriage and of your children.


The husband and wife bond is created this way and it will strengthen over time. This bond will allow you to become empty nesters, peacefully facing your children leaving home one at a time. God entrusts us with children so that we will raise them and then let them go. And one day, Lord willing, you will have the joy of being one-on-one with your spouse once again.

We pray you will always remain husband and wife, long before and after becoming a father and a mother. Your spouse and your children will be forever grateful!


>>This blog is a sneak peek into the e-book “12 Keys to Staying In-Love” from the series my husband and I created called “60 Keys to Better Your Relationship”. We created this series to be an interactive journey with you and your spouse. This book has practical keys with exercises. So, you'll be learning in an interactive way with your spouse. Each of these twelve proven keys provide a new concept to help your relationship be the best it can be, enabling your relationship to revive and thrive. Staying in-love for a lifetime is possible! Click this link to buy the e-book and get access to all 12 Keys!


Rachel Miquel Dufour



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